Determining Your Own Self-Worth After Getting A Divorce

Self-worth is what helps a woman define how valuable she isas a human being. This can only be calculated in a woman's own heart, as itshould never be attached to the opinions of others. Nor should her self-worthbe attached to a role that she plays in life or even her paid job or careerdescription. Instead, self-worth must radiate from the very core of a woman'ssoul. But most of all, a woman must clearly explore and define her ownself-worth so that she can guide the direction of her life through herdecisions, her actions and her role in the key relationships in her life.

How Does a Woman's Sense of Self-WorthShape Her Life?

Consider for a moment a woman who accepts the opinions of others who do notvalue her as she is and, in turn, her sense of self-worth becomes skewed. Shehas allowed others to calculate her value because she has not done the properself-exploration to know and love herself intimately. Therefore, left to thewhim of others, she has now determined that her value is not much and,therefore, she accepts abusive treatment, neglect, demeaning circumstances andallows unhealthy relationships to validate her existence.

Conversely, another woman has not avoided the opinions of others, but has notcherished them above her own. She has taken inventory of who she is; she isfamiliar with her strengths and her weaknesses. This woman has determined thatshe is valuable because she exists and, just like every other human being onearth, she has gifts, talents, abilities and value to contribute to the world.Despite what anyone else thinks of her, good or bad, this woman has taken stockof who she is and has decided that she is worthy of respect, of love, ofloyalty and of happiness.

In the latter case, this woman pursues her passions and her purpose with aquality sense of awareness that appreciates the praise of others, but doesn'trely on others for validation. It is highly unlikely that this woman will fallinto the trap of an abusive or neglectful relationship, simply because sheknows who she is and she knows that she is deserving of loving care. No one canundermine what she knows to be true-she is powerful, capable and worthy ofrespect.

Have You Overlooked Your Own Value?

Few young women possess the wisdom to clearly define their self-worth beforeembarking on married life. Unfortunately, many of these women find themselvesdivorced and later struggle to find out who they are and what they mean to theworld as a divorced woman. Getting a divorce, by itself, can create awfulfeelings of rejection, invalidation and feelings of low self-worth. Women withthese feelings find themselves looking for new relationships to repair or coverup the emotional damage they suffered in their marriage and never take the timeto truly heal. Neither do they take the time to discover how valuable theytruly are.

Redefining Self-Worth After a Divorce

Instead, divorce should be embraced as an opportunity to correct some of thisfaulty thinking. It is at this time that a woman is able to redefine herselfand she should welcome this time as an opportunity to explore her worth. Inthis time and space a woman is free to focus her energy on nurturing her soul.The time after a divorce does not have to be filled with depression anddejection. To the contrary, it should be valued as a time of rebirth and a timefor a woman to learn to calculate her own self-worth.