Is My Cheating Husband Grounds for Divorce?

Not anymore.The way divorce used to work in most states was that a grievance would bebrought by one spouse or the other and that particular grievance would eitherbe grounds for divorce or not. A cheating husband or cheating wife wasoften grounds for divorce because theloyal spouse was so insulted and humiliated the chances for reconciliation wereslim. Eventually most state legislatures were told to mind their own businesswhen it came to a reason for divorce and they responded by giving couplescomplete freedom to divorce if there were "irreconcilabledifferences." Now a couple can divorce each other very easily; at least asfar as most states are concerned.

Is a Cheating Husband Really a Good Reason for Divorce?

I have beenasked this question a number of times and my answer is not always the same.There are questions I ask in return:

1. Do you have any children?
2. How long have you been married?
3. Are there drugs and alcohol involved?
4. Is there any physical spousal abuse involved?
5. How many times have either of you been married?

As you can seeby the questions the answer is not always so simple. It is important of coursefor spouses to be loyal to one another, but it is also important for spouses tounderstand what marriage is and what behaviors work within a marriage toenhance all of the goals each person has when they get married.

The big problemin our society is that nobody knows what the heck marriage is and nobodyunderstands the very basics of relationship building. The role models for ahappy marriage are nowhere to be found in our society. Television sitcoms,parents and other relatives, and schools that don't have any "how tolive" programs or education, all sent you into the deep end of marriage lifewithout so much as a travel pamphlet to guide you. So it isn't 100% fair toexpect people to suffer through a blistering marriage without some breakdowns.

In just aboutevery case, infidelity is a manifestation of ignorance-driven frustration andso carries a little less of the taint of evil than we would normally ascribe toit.

Infidelity is Not Excusable, but should Not be Punishable byDeath of the Marriage

Every couplewho came to see me where there was infidelity, was able to rescue andresuscitate their marriage.

In fact, theywent on to have amazing marriages because once they learned how to be married,the normal evil actions of that infidelity were understood and put into acontext of non-judgment.

If your husbandis cheating on you, I recommend you shift your perspective and recognize hisweakness rather than his treachery. Read my LessonsFor A Happy Marriage so you can have adeep understanding of what created his infidelity. Until then, don't imagineeven for a second that it is your fault. Even those ladies who protest and saythey don't take on any of the blame, there is always a little bit ofquestioning in their minds as to whether they were adequate wives or not.

Lastly, if youare not married but reading this to see what you should do about a cheatingboyfriend or fiancé, my answer is very simple: move on. A man who is notcompletely caught up in the joys and excitement of marrying you is not worthyof your commitment to him.

Marriage ismeant to be joyful and simple, but our culture has done nothing to educate you.Once you learn this simple math of marriage a very happy family life isassured; but until then you are groping in the dark. Strike the match ofeducation to light your way to happiness.