Save your Marriage - Save your Children

I live in a town that has abeautiful meditation garden sitting atop 100-foot bluffs that look out over thePacific Ocean.  It is agreat tourist spot whose beauty is not overlooked by us locals.  Sometimes I go as often as two or three timesa week, even if it is for just a few minutes. Sundays are a particularly busy time for the garden and it is always apleasure to smile at others who are enjoying the beauty and tangible spiritualvibration.  Yesterday when I went to thegarden there was a lady with two little children, the cutest little girls youcould ever imagine.  One was four and ahalf who was just visited by the Tooth Fairy and the other was still backpacksize.

It was obvious the lady hadnever come there before and I sort of drifted into the role of a tourguide.  Although she was very sweet sheseemed a bit tense and it wasn't very long before she revealed to me that shehad just been divorced.  As any of mykids would tell you I am very sensitive to that word: divorce.  Over the years it has become abundantly clearto me that a divorce is something that adults do, and children go through.

"SaveYour Marriage, Save Your Children" Has Become One of My Battle Cries.

Have you ever done somethingyou know you should not have done but instead of admitting it and accepting theresults you find ways to rationalize?  Ofcourse you have and so has everyone else. We humans are pretty clever in our ignorance.  When it comes to describing the results ofdivorce we have become masters of ignorance. Not only have we accepted divorce as normal but we have excused itcompletely and even come up with so-called benefits.  We are now at the point where we sufferunbelievably if we have to go through a divorce yet publicly act as if it is nobig deal.  But it is a big deal.  It is a huge deal and what it does to parentsis nothing compared to what it does to children.

TheFoundational Pillars of Each Child is The Mother and

The Fatherin Unity

Parents, do you know thatthese are not your children?  You didn'tcreate them. These children are God's. They are entrusted to those willing to sacrifice much for the privilegeof raising His children.  Yet our societyhas turned children into possessions that are fought over in courts of law.  Despite all of the rhetoric of putting thechildren first during a divorce or separation, parents ignore the fundamentalreality that they are trading away their commitment and obligations for thedelusive possibility of an easier life when divorced.  It won't come.  All that will happen will be suffering on topof suffering as you watch your children lose the sure footedness they used tohave in an intact marriage.

All Marriages are Fixable When You KnowHow

I have dedicated my life tosaving children by saving marriages.  Godnever intended for us to suffer in marriage; it is merely our ignorance of whatis required that creates so much suffering. Don't give up.  If your marriageisn't getting better every day it means you are doing something wrong.  You don't need counseling, you just need tounderstand marriage.