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Posted on January 29, 2009 by Paul Friedman | Posted under Marriage Wedding
The Most Common Mistakes Women Make When They Pick Their Future Spouse and The Right Way to Do It
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1) Is he drop-dead gorgeous? If he is remember that looks improve with love and diminish in importance over time. Don't even imagine that a man's looks has anything to do with what kind of husband he will be. 2) Does he love you like crazy? One of the greatest traps is when women love men because men love them. The kind of man he is outweighs how much he loves you. Don't be flattered into a relationship that will fail. 3) Is he romantic, socially graceful and generous? These are dating techniques used by savvy men. You are picking a husband and father for your kids; open your eyes. Social skills are learned skills. They have nothing to do with the man's inner strengths or weaknesses. The above are the three biggest mistakes women make in picking a spouse. The best way to pick a husband is by creating a list of all the favorable traits you can think of for your future husband. Then prioritize your list and challenge your top 10 selections. Make sure you are being practical because your future children depend on you doing a good job. And above all make sure you are being honest with yourself. If you think you're being shallow you probably are. If that is who you want to be it is okay. But think about the risks that come with choosing a book by its cover. After you have completed your list of positive traits it is time to make a list of all of the traits you would find unacceptable. Scrutinize your lists and make sure they are accurate, in accordance with your tastes and values. Remember that what you were doing is, in effect, "ordering" the husband of your choice. You are finding the future father for your children. Make sure they will have the best dad who ever lived, and you will have the best husband who ever lived. Most men marry the first woman who will have them (sorry guys) so it is up to you to select a quality man and treat him right. The final thing to do is to pray for guidance and protection. I think it's a great idea to do the above with a sincere request for God to kill any deal that He thinks will not work well. About The Author: Paul Friedman, author of Lessons For A Happy Marriage, entered into the business of helping couples mend their marriages after a very rough personal experience with divorce. Paul came out of an early retirement to become a mediator. His belief was that couples could easily work out the details of separation and get on with their lives. He discovered the truth from his clients: they only sought divorce because the help they found to stay together didn't work. Read more on his relationship advice blog, at Lessons For A Happy Marriage.com |
Tags: RELATIONSHIP ADVICE, MARRIAGE HELP, HAPPY MARRIAGE
